Read by Michael Flamel

As your intrepid gardening reporter and seeker of knowledge in all forms—terrestrial and celestial—I decided that 2025 would be the year I let the cosmos guide my planting decisions. Sure, I could stick to my usual method of consulting the Farmer’s Almanac, my own two hands, and a well-worn trowel, but where’s the fun in that? Instead, I took a deep dive into astrology, hoping that the universe had some hidden green-thumb wisdom to share.

Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21) — My Cosmic Calling to the Garden

Born on December 6 at 12:55 a.m. Pacific Time, I’m a classic Sagittarius: adventurous, impatient, and occasionally convinced that I know everything. Naturally, my astrological planting guide suggested bold, fast-growing plants that wouldn’t test my limited patience. That meant hot peppers (a nod to my love of spice), climbing beans (always reaching higher, just like me), and a few experimental crops that no one in New England should probably attempt, like Meyer lemons in a whiskey barrel.

But what about my gardening friends? I couldn’t hoard the celestial wisdom all to myself. I had to look up what the universe had in store for them, too.

Astrological Planting Guide for 2025

(Because if the stars can determine your love life, why not your lettuce harvest?)

Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19) — The Overachiever’s Victory Garden

Capricorns love structure, discipline, and results. Naturally, their garden should be full of hardy, high-yield crops that demand attention but reward persistence. Think Brussels sprouts, carrots, and winter squash. If anyone is capable of growing cabbages the size of bowling balls, it’s a Capricorn.

Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18) — The Quirky Urban Farmer

Eccentric, experimental, and always ahead of the trend, Aquarians should embrace hydroponic gardening. Why dig in the dirt when you can have a high-tech indoor basil farm? Outdoors, they might take a gamble on unusual crops—purple potatoes, exotic mushrooms, or heirloom tomatoes with names that sound like indie bands.

Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20) — The Dreamy Water Sign with a Soft Spot for Flowers

Pisces might forget to water their garden, so they need plants that thrive on neglect. Lavender, chamomile, and a moonlit patch of night-blooming jasmine would soothe their artistic souls. They could also try a whimsical strawberry patch, assuming they don’t get too distracted writing poetry about it.

Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19) — Impulsive, Fiery, and Likely to Start a Garden War

Aries needs fast-growing crops to match their impatience: radishes, arugula, and snap peas. They might also enjoy a garden that lets them battle nature itself, like a row of thorny blackberry bushes or a jalapeño patch that fights back.

Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20) — The Gourmet Gardener

Tauruses love food and comfort, so they should plant crops with luxurious flavors. Think butter lettuce, heirloom tomatoes, and an herb garden overflowing with thyme, rosemary, and basil. They’ll probably spend more time lounging in their garden than weeding it, but that’s very on-brand.

Gemini (May 21 – Jun 20) — Can’t Decide? Plant Everything

Geminis are the social butterflies of the zodiac and get bored easily, so they need variety. A mixed raised bed with colorful chard, peppers in every hue, and a salad mix that changes weekly will keep them entertained. Also, they should grow mint—because a Gemini’s Summer is full of impromptu mojitos.

Cancer (Jun 21 – Jul 22) — The Sentimental Gardener

Cancers love nurturing, so their gardens should be full of homey, comforting crops. Potatoes, onions, and cucumbers would be ideal. Bonus points for planting something with family history—maybe Grandma’s rhubarb or a tomato variety named after an old uncle.

Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22) — The Garden Show-off

Leos won’t be happy unless their garden is as grand as they are. Giant sunflowers, exotic melons, and anything that makes people say, “Wow, what is that?” are essential. They should also consider a pumpkin patch—after all, it’s not a proper harvest without a dramatic Fall photoshoot.

Virgo (Aug 23 – Sep 22) — The Precision Planter

Virgos love order and efficiency, so their gardens will be the best organized in town. Neatly labeled rows of kale, meticulously spaced beets, and an herb garden that looks like a botanical diagram? Perfect. Virgos will also be the only ones who actually follow a crop-rotation plan.

Libra (Sep 23 – Oct 22) — The Aesthetic Gardener

Libras care about beauty, so their garden must be Instagram-worthy. Think edible flowers, ornamental kale, and a perfectly curated herb spiral. They’re the ones who will match their garden trellis to their patio furniture.

Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21) — The Mysterious Grower of Strange Things

Scorpios love intensity, so they should embrace dark, moody plants: blood oranges, black tomatoes, and anything labeled “forbidden.” They also might excel at growing medicinal herbs… for reasons.

Final Thoughts from the Celestial Greenhouse

Did astrology make me a better gardener? Well, the jury’s still out on that. But one thing’s for sure—I now have an excuse when my cucumbers don’t sprout: “Mercury was in retrograde.” And if my hot peppers thrive? Clearly, it was my Sagittarius fire energy at work.

As for my gardening friends, whether they follow the stars or just the USDA planting guide, one thing remains certain: Spring is here, and the garden calls to us all. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to check my moon sign before deciding on my compost strategy. ❖